Since I’ve decided I want to tell everyone and their respective mothers about this blog, I’ve realized that people who aren’t entirely familiar with my brand of…humor might care for a more in depth explanation of what’s going on here.
I realize I have a tendency to sound angry when I’m not. I just like to view the world as a boxing match. You’re either landing punches, dodging punches or taking punches. You’re not mad about it. Heck no, boxers are psyched out of their minds to be beating each other senseless. It’s fun! And that’s how I view life. It may seem like I’m describing it in angry or even violent terms, but in reality, I’m having a blast (usually. I mean, c’mon, everyone has their bad days, or months, or whatever).
And this year long commitment I’m making, I’m getting more and more excited about it. At UC Davis, I got to experience the complications of trying to adhere to my Catholic faith at a public school for the first time in my life. I’m not sure if you’re aware of this, but I love people. Pretty much all people. They are all fascinating to me and I really enjoy hearing about different ways people view the world. However, a few people have the tendency to become defensive when they find out about my faith. And not because I went on a diatribe, but because I said something as nonchalant as the fact that I attend Mass regularly. I’ve found that many times, my views are not welcome. So I’ve kept them to myself. But this service program is about Catholicism. I’m going to be a religious education teacher, for crying out loud.
And here’s where I explain something and I hope not to offend anyone. So please, bear in mind…I’m only talking about my OWN PERSONAL experiences and am not making judgements on anyone else or how they live.
Part of those months where I was feeling unhappy were months where I was ignoring my faith, in a way. Year before that where I was happiest, I was involved in quite a few relationships that lead to earnest and didactic conversations about faith and beliefs and all that entails. These weren’t all with people who held the same beliefs as me. It’s hard to be didactic if you’re just blowing smoke up each other’s, um, if you’re just constantly agreeing with each other.
I’m truly looking forward to a year of complicated, challenging and ultimately rewarding conversations-with my housemates, with my students, (Did I tell you I’m helping teach teenagers about to receive confirmation? Yeah, talk about DIFFICULT conversations. Sweet.), with members of the parish, with inquisitive readers of this blog (haha, I made readers plural. When did I become such a dreamer? But seriously, ask my anything, say anything. Let me know who’s out there).
See, I’m already on a positive kick. This year just keeps looking up.